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I’ve never given full trust to God.   

There, I admit it.   I’ve always had an untrustful side that refused to believe that anyone could love me as much as God claimed to love me.   

Because of this mistrust. I never committed to tithing out of every paycheck.   I was scared we wouldn’t make it.   Scared we wouldn’t have food to eat or a way to buy diapers, formula, and pay the electric bill.  Because, in all honesty, we weren’t making it…. and I couldn’t see how “giving away” money to our church was going to help us.   

This month, after almost twenty years of marriage, we started tithing.   And, no, nothing miraculous happened.  I didn’t open the mailbox and find a check from a long lost relative or receive a huge royalty check from book sales.  What I have discovered is that there’s a peace I’ve never known.   A feeling that my Father is watching over me and sees that we are trusting Him.  

I don’t have the answers.  We still struggle daily, but I suppose that keeps us grounded and humble.   What I do know is that we will survive.   We will be okay.   We will trust and believe in God’s promises and be the example that our children need.   We’re not alone, and that’s the greatest feeling we’ve ever known.   

What do you struggle with when it comes to trusting God?

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